How to Hotwife – Lifestyle for Beginners. How to Start Hotwifing? Advice for Women in Becoming a Hotwife and more.
The hotwife lifestyle appeals to many men and women of an open-minded nature who have a strong relationship and wish to explore beyond the horizons of traditional sexuality in regard to marriage and monogamy.
The hotwife lifestyle differs from Polyamory or an open marriage because it refers specifically to a man’s wife having one or more sexual partners outside the marriage while the man remains faithful to his wife.
On the face of it, this seems unfair and biased in favor of women, but the truth is most women enter into the hotwife lifestyle at their husbands’ urging. It’s a very common fantasy for men to want to see their wives having sex with other men, and it has its root in evolutionary biology. Read More: Why do some men want to become a Cuckold?
However we are not robots, and despite the undoubted attraction of the lifestyle to many men (and women, once they’ve been persuaded to give it a try) there are more than enough stories of how the hotwife lifestyle has ended in disaster for us to conclude it does pose some very real emotional traps and pitfalls.
So if you are thinking about taking your first tentative steps into the hotwife lifestyle, here are three simple tips beginners will perhaps find useful in avoiding some of the bigger problems.
First, your man needs to feel emotionally secure. Once the bucking, heaving, and writhing are done, you’ll be kissing and cuddling your lover. That’s natural. But if your husband is present (or imagines it if he’s not — he’s not stupid), then it’s going to play on his emotions.
So she must remember he’ll need reassurance and reaffirmation after she’s done the deed — and after every time she’s done it.
Second, open and honest communication is paramount. One problem couples often face is when the woman goes off and makes love to another man, she, for whatever reason, is reluctant to talk about it — shyness, misplaced guilt, whatever.
But this is not how most men want it. If they’re not actually present watching, the overwhelming likelihood is they’ll want to make love to their wives the minute they walk back in the door while she’s telling him in exquisite detail about every last little detail, leaving nothing out.
She can’t have her cake and eat it and expect her man to be happy about it.
And third, everyone is different. What’s more every dynamic between different individuals is different. What this means in the hotwife lifestyle is the thing she does with you, her husband, are going to be different from the thing she does with her lover.
She might like things you don’t, but he does. He might be taller than you so can do different things. Maybe he’s bigger or loves different positions.
The point is you can’t really expect her to do exactly the same with you she does with him. It’s not a judgment of your worth as a lover — it’s just how things are sometimes.
Remember: the hotwife lifestyle is supposed to be fun and beneficial to your marriage. So don’t get all wound up about irrelevant details and let it ruin your fun.
How to Start Hotwifing Lifestyle?
The question of how to start hotwifing is not as simple to answer as you might think.
Or, rather, there is a simple answer but it’s not a very useful one: “just go out and fuck another man, dear”.
Alas, that’s a recipe for disaster.
Because it’s important to realize not only are men and women generally wired up very differently when to comes to sex but our reactions after the deed is done can be very different from what we expected and truly believed they’d be.
Let’s take the first thing first: different wiring.
A man’s idea of hotwifing is all about sex. But the woman, once she calms down and actually listens to his idea, thinks about it more in terms of romance and emotion.
So you have to be careful to make sure she understands you are not asking her to get into another relationship with someone else. You don’t really want her having another “boyfriend”. You want her to have a lover or a fuckbuddy.
What this means is when you both go looking for the right man, you have to be looking for him with this role in mind. One common piece of advice is to seek a married man because he won’t want to become “involved”.
Bad idea. In our experience, married men who are willing to become the lovers of hotwives are doing it because they are in miserable marriages. So you’re almost always better off going for a single man.
Fortunately, some time ago God invented the Internet and there have inevitably sprung up more “contact” sites than you can shake a stick at. Obviously, you need to take the usual precautions about not meeting some weirdo alone in a cemetery at midnight dressed as Pinocchio, but that’s just common sense. Check out: The Best Dating Websites for Cuckold Couples and Bulls 2021
And you’ll need to take the usual sexual precautions, too. More common sense.
Now, she can only ever do her “first time” once, so it’s important to get it right. When my wife, Joss, did her first time, it was out of the house while I waited at home. It all worked out OK for us, but in retrospect, we think it would have been safer for us to all have met in a hotel bar and booked two adjoining rooms.
That way I’d have been able to listen in on them fucking (and I love to do that — in some ways, it’s better than watching), and I’d have been close enough for her to call for help if she needed it.
But the biggest thing is that feeling of butterflies. I have to confess when she left to meet him that first time I went into a panic. And, I wanted to phone her to call it all off. I was in a mess… but the moment she walked in the door afterward, I knew it was going to be OK.
We were lucky — I know other couples aren’t.
So my advice is to inform yourself and get every base covered for this oh-so-important first time of hers.
Advice for Women in Becoming a Hotwife
So I think it’s worth now giving some very specific advice to women who are seriously considering taking their husbands up on the deal and who want to have the best chance of making it work instead of blowing up in their faces.
First, be truthful and free with the detail. Sometimes it’s hard for a woman who’s just had a night of passion with another man to talk to her husband about it. After all, it’s not generally done, is it? If you “kiss and tell”, it brands you as a “certain kind” of woman.
But not in this case. With hotwifing, he wants to hear every last detail. And I promise you, if you start playing coy and keeping things to yourself, then it really will not end well.
Second, he almost certainly wants to watch. It’s not just that he wants to be around so he knows you’re safe, but he also wants to see it happening. For him, it’s all part of the fantasy.
The overwhelming majority of men who what their wives to become hotwives have the ultimate fantasy of their wives looking them dead square in the eyes as their lover slowly enters them for the first time.
He wants to see everything. So let him. Don’t be shy and try to keep the two things separate. It’s part of the price you pay for having such a wonderful, generous, and understanding husband.
Third, he wants you to be hot and dirty and to relax. I know a lot of women are uptight about it when their husbands are watching because they think he’s going to get upset or angry, even though he’s the one who had the idea.
But this is a mistake.
He wants to hear you groaning and moaning and begging your lover for more.
And, he wants to hear your lovemaking you cum like a train.
He wants to see you are having the fuck of your life.
After a while, most hotwives get the hang of things, but often not before some needless upsets. If you take this all on board from the outset, you’ll have an easier time with things.
Source: Ezine Articles https://ezinearticles.com/
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